Morbidementia » Horror Movies

Claymation version of John Carpenter’s “The Thing”

Morbidementia — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 05:44:55 +0000

I just watched the 2011 prequel “The Thing“, and I’ll be damned but it wasn’t bad. Got me to reminiscing about the original 1982 movie, and then I stumbled across this:

Its from a guy named Lee Hardcastle, and there’s plenty more where it came from!

Really dig it, its like a cross between that stop-motion tribute to The Thing starring GI Joe figures and one of Takeda’s claymation horror movies.

The Best Horror of 2011

Morbidementia — Sat, 24 Dec 2011 21:52:12 +0000

I sat down to write a top 10 list of the best horror movies of 2011. As I was mulling over titles like “Fright Night 3D”, “Shark Night 3D”, “Paranormal Activity 3″, “Scream 4″, and “Final Destination 5″, a revelation dawned on me. It was so disturbing and so unthinkable, I was instantly in denial. But after much ruminating and soul-searching, I know it to be true. The revelation is this:

The best horror shows of 2011 were television shows.

Don’t get me wrong, there were some really good horror movies in 2011. “Tucker and Dale vs Evil” easily topped the heap of the horror comedies, (though to be honest, there wasn’t much of a heap). And in a very welcome change of pace, the best foreign horror movie, “Trolljegeren (TrollHunter)”, came from Norway instead of Japan or Korea. As far as domestic horror went, “Insidious” seemed to be the crowd pleaser while my personal #1 was the giddy grindhouse gorefest, “Hobo With a Shotgun”.

But my favorite horror experiences in 2011 have been on the small screen, not the big screen.

American Horror Story

“American Horror Story” has absolutely smashed the boundaries of horror on television. It’s smarter, deeper, and darker than anything that has come before it. I have never been a fan of haunted house stories, (just LEAVE THE HOUSE!), yet “American Horror Story” is right at the top of my list. Its like a mix between Amityville Horror and Sixth Sense with a dash of Twin Peaks thrown in – except that the house has more character, everybody can see dead people instead of just one little boy, and there’s no creepy midget. Not yet, anyways. The language is extremely adult for television, and so is the violence, and so is the sex. But what makes it really good, of course, is the story. Slowly unraveling the mysteries of the house and the history of the spirits who inhabit it is a lot of fun, especially when reality is so warped that the characters can’t see things for what they really are. For example, the maid of the house appears to females as a slightly deformed older lady, but at the same time she appears to males as a sultry and sexy young redheaded strumpet with a voice that can purr their pants right off. It’s pure genius.

Grimm

Filmed on location in beautiful Portland, Oregon, where I live, “Grimm” has been a very interesting breath of fresh air. A detective fears he’s going mad when he starts seeing normal everyday folks turn into monsters, and he’s the only one that can see their true faces. It turns out he has inherited the family curse of being able to see the beasts that walk among us, pretending to be human. And what’s worse, he has inherited the awesome responsibility to keep watch and maintain the precarious balance between the humans and the creatures that pretend to be human as he investigates the murders and crimes the creatures perpetrate. Not as dark as it could/should be, but still very compelling.

Teen Wolf

Perhaps the biggest surprise of 2011 was the TV show “Teen Wolf“. It had a lot of cards stacked against it from the start. It was on MTV, the cast was almost entirely comprised of ridiculously-good-looking teenagers, and… well… it’s called “Teen Wolf”. I fully expected the show to lick balls like a dirty dog and be just as bad (or worse) than “Vampire Diaries”, which I like to call “Vampire Diarrheas”. But I’m a huge fan of werewolves, so I had to watch it. And I’ll be damned if the show wasn’t awesome! It deftly plays off the good ol’ “who bit me and turned me into a werewolf?” mystery bit, and Dylan O’Brien steals every single scene he’s in as the werewolf’s best friend, Stiles. I look forward to seeing what this kid will do next, he’s got talent.

Being Human

Another horror TV show that surprised me in 2011 with its lack of suckage was “Being Human“, the American version. Gasp, I know. The original British version of this show is one of the best television shows of all time, hands down, horror or not, and when I first heard there was going to be an American remake, I groaned and I growled. But again, it had werewolves, so I was practically forced to watch it. Is it as good as what the Brits brought? No. No, it’s not. But it’s still pretty awesome. Good casting and some key deviations from the British version kept the show fresh and interesting.

I’d like to point out that “Teen Wolf” is a very very loose remake, and “Being Human” is also a remake. For them to be this good is quite impressive, especially considering that when a movie is remade it’s almost always a travesty against humanity. Only “American Horror Story” and “Grimm” are true originals, and that’s probably part of what gives them an edge for me. Especially “American Horror Story”. I really can’t recommend it enough.

That’s it for this year’s new horror television shows. The rest of my list is comprised of shows that returned this year for another season. This part of the list isn’t in any particular order, either.

Lost Girl

God bless Canada. This show is not afraid of anything. “Lost Girl” plays late at night and the Canucks are way more laid back than Americans, so there’s plenty of cussing, partial nudity (yay sideboobs!), lesbianism, and a bit o’ bloody murder to keep things very interesting. It also helps that both the leading ladies are just about the sexiest things on two legs, especially my lovely Russian girlfriend, Ksenia Solo. If you so much as look at her, I swear on my grave I will kill you. The show is confident in its vision and completely gelled in its second season, effortlessly mixing together the genres of fantasy, horror, and romance without breaking a sweat. (Although there is plenty of sweating during all the sex scenes.)

Supernatural

Now in its seventh season, “Supernatural” is better than ever! This season has brought some huge shake-ups, and I don’t want to give out any spoilers, but there are lots of deaths. Well, there’s always lots of deaths, but these deaths are more important than the other deaths. I can’t really say anything else without ruining it for any of you losers who haven’t watched it yet. But suffice it to say that shit gets HEAVY. The stakes have never been higher. Its great to see a show this long in the tooth keep coming up with new ideas and maintain its energy.

Dexter

The only show on this list that’s not on network television or basic cable, “Dexter” makes subscribing to Showtime worth the money all by itself. The sixth season started out a little slow, but the heat built slowly and steadily until I felt like that proverbial frog in the pot of water on the stove that somebody kept easing the knob up on. Before I knew it, things got completely out of control and there was no stopping them. Although Dexter Morgan might make the occasional misstep as he hunts down serial killers and struggles to keep his own murderous nature secret from everyone around him, the show “Dexter” never misses a step.

The Walking Dead

Last but certainly not least, “The Walking Dead” entered its second season in 2011. After ending its first season on a weaker note, I was a little worried, but it busted out of the starting gates and exceeded all expectations. The practical effects still meet and beat the special effects of any zombie movie, but its real strength is in its character development. You can’t help but care about each and every survivor, and the creators make no bones about the fact that any character is fair game and its always hunting season for the zombies. It warms my shriveled little black heart that “The Walking Dead” has had so much success in the mainstream. This show has definitely opened doors for horror on television, and as long as it keeps doing what its doing, its going to open many more.

All in all, its a great time to be a horror fan watching television right now. If you’re sick of the same old lame horror movies being trotted out in theaters and dumped in front of us like slop in a trough for pigs, then stay home and flip on the boob tube. Better yet, record these horror television shows and then watch them so you can fast forward through all the commercials. Save yourself the ticket money, the gas money, and the disappointment.

No related posts.

“Left 4 Dead” fan film: so close to not sucking

Morbidementia — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 17:00:08 +0000

“Left 4 Dead” is a killer game. If you’ve played it then you love it, and you’re going to love this fan-made film about Left 4 Dead… right up until the end, that is.

Oof, that hurt.

Teaser Trailer for Ridley Scott’s “Alien” prequel, “Prometheus”

Morbidementia — Thu, 22 Dec 2011 22:52:29 +0000

So I fell off the earth for a while, and I couldn’t really find a good reason to get back on it. Happens to me sometimes. But then something incredible happened, and now here I am! Hurry up and check out the new teaser trailer for the prequel to Ridley Scott’s 1979 masterpiece “Alien” before it gets yanked!

If the movie has been pulled from YouTube by the time you read this, you should probably still be able to find it at the official movie site or on the Apple trailers site. Then again you might not, as it seems Fox got a little overzealous earlier and actually yanked the trailer from their own official movie site, claiming copyright infringement! DOH!

Following the development of “Prometheus” was making me (and millions of other Aliens fans) very nervous. After the Aliens movies gradually degraded in quality, one after the other, it seemed too good to be true that the original director from the original Alien movie would finally grab the helm again and deliver a prequel to the movie that started it all. But once development started, Ridley Scott constantly butted heads with Fox over core aspects, like what the budget should be and what the movie should be rated. Fox essentially wanted the movie to film on a shoestring budget with the goal of a PG rating. Scott wanted enough money to do it right, and he wanted an R rating, just like all the other Aliens movies got. Scott and Fox simply couldn’t come to an agreement, and at one point it looked like Prometheus was never going to happen. I have to admit, I found it all so disheartening, I sort of tuned out on the project.

But now, this! This teaser is incredible. I’m more excited for this movie than I’ve been for any movie in recent memory. One commenter on reddit.com summed my feelings up perfectly: “This is so damn exciting that I feel like my excitement is going to burst out my chest, squeal, run across the countertop, and disappear into an air duct.”

Netflix Instant Bad Movie Marathon Part 4, plus updates!

Morbidementia — Tue, 13 Sep 2011 23:32:29 +0000

A lot of exciting things have been happening with the Bad Netflix Crew over the last month. For starters, we now have our very own official website! Be sure to bookmark it, because from now on that is where all of the official Netflix Instant Bad Movie Marathon schedules and information will be posted. Head over there right now to get the scoop on this Saturday’s Netflix Instant Bad Movie Marathon movie lineup and showtimes! This is our fourth get together, the movies look totally bad… as in BAD ASS… and we’d love to see you there!

We also have several new ways you can reach us:
Twitter: @BadNetflixCrew and hashtag #BadNetflix
Facebook: Bad Netflix Crew
Email: badnetflixcrew@gmail.com

Its all pretty mindfudging, this crazy creation is ALIVE and we couldn’t be more stoked!

THIS SATURDAY! Netflix Instant Bad Movie Marathon Part 3!

Morbidementia — Wed, 10 Aug 2011 00:34:15 +0000

NETFLIX INSTANT BAD MOVIE MARATHON!

(Part 3: Full-On Full-Moon Fools-Gold!)

Saturday August 13th, 2011 starting at 8:30e/7:30c/6:30m/5:30p

(Saturday the 13th is a Full Moon, so we will pay our respects by hosting WEREWOLF NIGHT!)

What is the Netflix Instant Bad Movie Marathon?

About two months ago we had our first ever Bad Movie Night on Twitter. We chose 3 movies available on Netflix Instant that we deemed bad enough to be awesome. Then we watched them and ripped on them MST3K style via Twitter. Also, we drank pretty heavily and misspelled words constantly. But we had so much fun that we did it AGAIN! We’ve watched baboons driving tanks, hunky men throwing things into outer space, but this time we pay tribute to the moon: Werewolf Night.

What can you do?

JOIN US! Get on Twitter, Fire up your Netflix Instant machines (if you’re watching on your computer you’ll have to download a plugin FYI), find a comfortable spot and rip these movies to shreds with us! Why? BECAUSE THEY DESERVE IT! Just be sure to post your Twitter handles in the comments section or seek us out on Twitter and let us know you’re in on the fun. (On Twitter you can add people to a list, that way you don’t have to follow on your regular newsfeed, you can just pick it up on the list. Also, we will be using the hashtag #BadNetflix. It worked really well last time and anyone that sees our posts will be able to pull up that hashtag and see what everyone else is doing as well!

But let’s say you are a Twitter Hater. You find the thought of Twitter repulsive. Then PLEASE do this through any other means you think you can reach people worldwide! Have an active blog, update via facebook, throw a party on xbox, Skype it! Whatever you want to do, just whatever you do PLEASE let us know so we can follow along! And also keep locked onto our Twitter feeds to keep up to the minute with the world’s greatest bad movie commentary! (MST3K aside of course.)

By all means, make it your own. Maybe doodle pictures while you’re watching it, record yourself hating yourself for watching these movies, whatever you want to do!

Where can you find us?

One of NIBMM founders, Vincent, was nice enough to keep a neat list of past participants on his Twitter account. Please CLICK HERE to see the current list of the Bad Netflix Crew and make sure to follow them.

If you’re new, be sure to let Vincent know so he can add you to the Bad Netflix Crew list.

What are we watching?

Monster Dog
1984 – 84 min – Not Rated
Directed by: Claudio Fragrasso (The genius behind Troll 2!)
IMDb Rating: 4.0/10
Synopsis: Musician Vincent Raven (rocker Alice Cooper) ends up in trouble when, girlfriend (Victoria Vera) in tow, he heads to his boyhood home to film a video with his band. Soon after they arrive, a string of horrific deaths occur, seemingly caused by a pack of wild dogs. Two decades earlier, an angry mob killed Vincent’s dad, who was thought to be a werewolf; naturally, the townsfolk presume like father, like son. Will Vincent suffer his father’s fate?

Mom
1991 – 95 min – Rated R
Directed by: Patrick Rand (This EDITOR’S only Directorial credit!)
IMDb Rating: 4.5/10
Synopsis: Proving that flesh-eating monsters don’t practice age discrimination, this black comedy tells the tale of elderly Emily Dwyer (Jeanne Bates), who takes a suspicious lodger into her Los Angeles home. After being bitten by him, she develops a taste for her son, Clay (Mark Thomas Miller). Desperate to keep his mother from committing homicide, Clay has her incarcerated, but after she escapes he must take matters into his own hands.

Hybrid
2007 – 90 min – Not Rated
Directed by: Yelena Lanskaya (she looks like a Hallmark director)
IMDb Rating: 3.2/10 (This’ll probably be continuing the Curse of the Third Movie)
Synopsis: Using a risky transplant operation, Dr. Hewlitt (Justine Bateman) restores the vision of newly blinded Aaron (Cory Monteith) by replacing his eyes with those of an injured wolf’s. Now, Aaron can see in the dark, and his dangerous wolflike behavior only increases with time. Part wolf as well, museum curator Lydia (Tinsel Korey) decides to help Aaron, but Dr. Hewlitt’s colleagues are convinced the man-wolf is dangerous and resolve to hunt him down.

What time should you tune in?

Monster Dog – 84 minutes – begin 8:30e/7:30c/6:30m/5:30p

*15 minute break*

Mom – 95 minutes – begin 10:10e/9:10c/8:10m/7:10p

*15 minute break*

Hybrid – 90 minutes – begin 12:00(am)e/11:00c/10:00m/9:00p

Last Words

Thank you again to ALL that participated last month and got this thing off the ground. This is truly a fun time to spend on the internet. In all honesty, it’s all about hanging out with cool people that happen to live hundreds of miles away. I’m so happy I get to do this and I’m glad other people enjoy it too. Hopefully we’ll rope in a few others into participating again this Saturday. I’m sure we can. I know we can. See you all Saturday! I look forward to fishing for gold on Netflix Instant with all of you!

New Romance: music video for Final Destination 5 by Miles Fisher

Morbidementia — Sun, 07 Aug 2011 00:44:03 +0000

This music video is simultaneously a spoof of Saved By The Bell AND ALSO a trailer for Final Destination 5… and it stars all the actors from the movie! It’s an original song by musician Miles Fisher… who not only stars in the music video but ALSO stars in the movie!

This Saturday! Netflix Instant Bad Movie Marathon Returns…

Morbidementia — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 20:17:27 +0000

Mr. Gable’s Reality. Morbidementia. She Blogged By Night. Vincent’s Handmade Art. Guts and Grog Reviews. 365 Horror Movie. Mrs. Gable.

WE’RE BACK BABY!!

FOR

THE

Mega Awesome Ultra Crazy Always Amazing
NETFLIX INSTANT BAD MOVIE MARATHON!
(Part 2: Texas Blood Money)

Saturday July 16th, 2011 starting at 8:30e/7:30c/6:30m/5:30p

A History of Texas Blood Money

Why the tagline Texas Blood Money? This all boils down to one man… Mr Gable’s friend CG. Once upon a time they were ripping on movies and it was decided that all part 2’s need to have the tagline Texas Blood Money. Why? Because it’s fucking awesome, that’s why. So to this day Mr Gable continues the TBM tradition with every part 2 that he does. Why? Because it’s fucking awesome.

What is the Netflix Instant Bad Movie Marathon?

Over a month ago we had our first ever Bad Movie Night on Twitter. We chose 3 movies available on Netflix Instant that we deemed bad enough to be awesome. Then we watched them and ripped on them MST3K style via Twitter. Also, we drank pretty heavily and misspelled words constantly. But we had so much fun that we’re doing it AGAIN! Last time we were able to rope in a few people into doing this with us, let’s try to get a few more!

What can you do?

JOIN US! Get on Twitter, Fire up your Netflix Instant machines (if you’re watching on your computer you’ll have to download a plugin FYI), find a comfortable spot and rip these movies to shreds with us! Why? BECAUSE THEY DESERVE IT! Just be sure to post your Twitter handles in the comments section or seek us out on Twitter and let us know you’re in on the fun. (On Twitter you can add people to a list, that way you don’t have to follow on your regular newsfeed, you can just pick it up on the list. Also, we will be using the hashtag #badnetflix. It worked really well last time and anyone that sees our posts will be able to pull up that hashtag and see what everyone else is doing as well!

By all means, make it your own. Maybe doodle pictures while you’re watching it, record yourself hating yourself for watching these movies, whatever you want to do!

Where can you find us?

Mr. Gable – @mrgablesreality
Mrs. Gable – @MrsGable1
Tromeric (Guts and Grog Reviews) – @Tromeric
Vincent’s Handmade Art – @vinstem
Scary Larry (Morbidementia) – @morbidementia
Stacia (She Blogged By Night) – @glitterninja
365 Horror Movie – @365HorrorMovie

What are we watching?

The Order of the Black Eagle

1987 – 93 minutes – Rated R
Directed by Worth Keeter (Director of A LOT of Power Ranger episodes)
IMDb Rating: 3.5/10 stars
Synopsis: In this outlandish spy-film send-up, James Bond wannabe Duncan Jax (Ian Hunter) and his tank-driving baboon infiltrate a South American lair where a group of Nazis scheme to revive a cryogenically frozen Adolf Hitler. Armed with high-tech gadgets and joined by sizzling hot lady agents, Jax turns his mission into a wildly explosive crusade against the fascist baddies. Worth Keeter directs this over-the-top action flick.

NOTES: There is NOTHING to hate about that synopsis.

Mafia vs Ninja

1985 – 91 minutes – Not Rated
Directed by Robert Tai (Director of A LOT of Kung Fu movies)
IMDb Rating: 6.0/10 stars
Synopsis: Mafia hit men and Shanghai’s fiercest ninjas mix it up in this action-packed martial arts film. After refusing to pay protection money to a violent group of gangsters, buddies Jack Do and Charlie Woo join an opposing mafia gang. When their boss, Mr. Chung, is killed by the rival gang, Jack and Charlie vow revenge and find themselves in an all-out war against ninjas and mercenaries. Alexander Lou and Silvio Azzolini star.

NOTES: This is the main event right here. I’ve watched about 30 seconds of it and had to shut if off because my face hurt from smiling. THIS IS GOING TO BE AWESOME.

Trespassers

2005 – 82 minutes – Not Rated
Directed by Ian McCrudden (Director of NOTHING.)
IMDb Rating: 4.0/10 stars
Synopsis: Looking to ride some killer waves and party hearty, Colin (Kaiwi Lyman) and his surfing buddies head for a secluded beach south of the border. But when the teens take a back-roads shortcut, they get hopelessly lost and end up at an abandoned campsite strewn with carnage. The hapless vacationers soon discover that they’ve stumbled onto evil terrain in this fast-paced horror flick directed by Ian McCrudden.

NOTES: Finally, some fucking TITS! That’s the only reason its here. That and it’s a perfect movie to NOT pay attention to after 3 and a half hours of drinking.

What time should you tune in?

The Order of the Black Eagle – 93 min – 8:30e/7:30c/6:30m/5:30p

*15 min break*

Mafia vs Ninja – 91 min – 10:20e/9:20c/8:20m/7:20p

*15 min break*

Trespassers – 82 min – 12:10e(am)/11:10c/10:10m/9:10p

Last words

Thank you to all who participated in last month’s Netflix Instant Bad Movie Marathon and thank you to all of you that will be participating this time! We are thinking about doing this once a month (our schedules permitting) because it’s just so cool to not only watch these movies and make fun of them but to watch movies with people who live IN ANOTHER PART OF THE WORLD.

And you don’t have to suffer alone.

Johnny Depp as Carl Kolchak?!

Morbidementia — Tue, 12 Jul 2011 19:53:58 +0000

According to Deadline, Johnny Depp is a fan of the classic ABC series Kolchak: The Night Stalker and he’s working on getting a new Kolchak movie made… and he wants to play Carl Kolchak!

For those unfamiliar, (and shame on you if you are), Kolchak: The Night Stalker was a 1970′s TV show starring the late great Darren McGavin. The series itself was a spin-off of an excellent made-for-TV-movie called, simply, The Night Stalker, and its actually this TV movie that Johnny wants to remake. The TV show is an obvious influence on the X-Files and also on countless real-life monster hunters and cryptozoologists. Each episode saw newspaper reporter Carl Kolchak come face to face with some supernatural menace, forced to fight it with nothing but his wits. All the while his boss and the police and everyone else he comes into contact with refuse to believe his stories and his warnings, even after its too late. To the outside world Kolchak is a wacko conspiracy theorist, but to the viewer he’s the only thing protecting us from evil itself. Kolchak: The Night Stalker is quite easily one of my all-time favorite TV horror series.

There was an attempted remake of the TV series in the mid-2000′s, but the less said about that, the better.

Johnny Depp is an excellent actor, but its hard for me to imagine anyone doing the role after Darren McGavin owned it so totally and completely. His mix of cantankerous rebellion and bumbling heroics were absolutely perfect. But if anyone can do it, I suppose its Johnny Depp. Whatever the case, I’m definitely excited and I hope this deal comes through!

Dead Girl – fake trailer by Takena

Morbidementia — Fri, 27 May 2011 23:28:50 +0000

Another awesome claymation horror clip from Takena, the creator of Pussycat! This one is a fake trailer Takena made for a contest in Japan. Clay blood everywhere. Enjoy!